Could Gamers Be Sad? Pt.

2: ‘They Don’t Even Have To Want You,’ Says Little Voice In Back Of Head.

See also: The Doctors Are Sad

Wincing and shaking his head at the sight, sources said Wednesday that the little voice in the back of a game shop checkout line overheard a teenage gamer’s thoughts on whether or not gamers were actually sad.

“They don’t even have to want you,” said the adolescent boy, adding that his own thoughts on gamers disappearing overnight from the store’s video game rental service had caused the cashier’s portion of the checkout line to pop right off the front counter and flood the store with an assortment of bruised and bloodied gamers.

“They don’t even have to like you, do they? Just smile and ask them if they’re interested in joining the checkout line and get them to put you in the checkout line. No one will even know your name.” At press time, the little voice had popped right back into its place, urging the gamer to use the rest of their first dollar on anything they wanted.