There Is Not Enough Dead People In The World To Make Me Feel A Demonic Thing.

See also: Boomers Have Destroyed The World

I’ve been having a real quiet panic lately, and it’s not just me—my whole group is freaking the fuck out” said local resident Pete Walters, echoing the sentiments of the dozens of other people in the room who were sick with a combination of malignant narcissism, self-centered arrogance, and gross incompetence that made them incapable of experiencing even the slightest shred of what life is actually like. “I’m totally tapped out on good, clean-cut sociopaths who can’t be bothered to properly communicate their bullshit to you, so it’s kind of nice to have one of those two in me.

Honestly, I was never capable of taking the place of a truly good, well-adjusted person, but I’m pretty much totally tapped out on trying to be the other kind anyway.” At press time, the room had suddenly found itself convinced that at least one other person wasn’t entirely suitable for the position.