The World Is Flat, And It’s Getting Worse Not Good Enough.
Stating that scientific research would support any other conclusion, experts confirmed Wednesday that the world is currently running out of ideas and there are no good alternatives.
See also: You No Longer Exist
“There are certainly things we can do to make the human race less great and interesting to other people, but honestly, I’m not even there yet,” said lead researcher Bruno 2.S.
Unger, adding that no matter how much progress we make, there is simply not enough evidence to draw any sort of conclusion.
“We definitely need to make space for something more interesting to do with our time, but I honestly have no idea if I’m ready for it. Honestly, I think we humans are pretty much meant to be here—it’s pretty much all we have to go on right now.” At press time, the world was once again thrown into chaos after a panic-induced hallucination resulted in everyone except for the sole remaining inhabitant of the hallucination losing their homes.